A Hole In My Heart
One of the things I have learned recently and had verified this weekend is that I have a big hole in my heart. The hole started on November 12, 1971 when I gave birth to my twin son and daughter. It was never detected and was enlarged when my daughter was born March 18, 1977. I never knew that the hole was there until they all left home and I began to notice that when I was with my children, or even one of them, that something dramatically would change in me. I would feel so different--so whole--and then our time together would end and there would be this emptiness again. Finally I realized that the hole in my heart only gets filled and gets my heart going at capacity when one of my children is with me. My heart was filled up this weekend when Baby Amanda visited me and we also visited with John.
The weekend was really fun. We did lots of girly stuff. We shopped, ate, went to a movie, shopped, ate some more, met John's Lady Cheryl and her mother Cynthia and her sisters for a meal that we all enjoyed thoroughly. This was my first meeting with Cheryl's family and I loved them all. It helped to fill up my heart even more. Now I feel that I have a bigger family than ever. I love family and family doings so this thrills me. We watched movies at home and took naps, went to church--everything a mom and her child should do. The loving bond between us was the best part of all. My nest had one of the chicks back.
Maybe it is because I am growing older and I am beginning to feel older that I feel so filled up when one of the children visits or I visit one of them. Then when it is over I have this profound feeling of emptiness for a little while--like the very life blood oozing out of that hole in my heart. As I have written before, I cannot imagine my life without these chicks of mine.
Now life goes on and I begin to pick up my life again and they go on with theirs until we have a meeting once more. Thank you God for my children and all of the other children that have come into my life through them. We have made life long memories for all of us that I hope will carry on for generations to come.
The weekend was really fun. We did lots of girly stuff. We shopped, ate, went to a movie, shopped, ate some more, met John's Lady Cheryl and her mother Cynthia and her sisters for a meal that we all enjoyed thoroughly. This was my first meeting with Cheryl's family and I loved them all. It helped to fill up my heart even more. Now I feel that I have a bigger family than ever. I love family and family doings so this thrills me. We watched movies at home and took naps, went to church--everything a mom and her child should do. The loving bond between us was the best part of all. My nest had one of the chicks back.
Maybe it is because I am growing older and I am beginning to feel older that I feel so filled up when one of the children visits or I visit one of them. Then when it is over I have this profound feeling of emptiness for a little while--like the very life blood oozing out of that hole in my heart. As I have written before, I cannot imagine my life without these chicks of mine.
Now life goes on and I begin to pick up my life again and they go on with theirs until we have a meeting once more. Thank you God for my children and all of the other children that have come into my life through them. We have made life long memories for all of us that I hope will carry on for generations to come.
posted by dddonna @ 6/13/2007 01:11:00 PM
1 Comments:
At 8:08 PM,
johnnie said…
peep!
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